Jeanne and Moon Kitty

Today I participated in a trip to Giayl's book so I could get the third chapter. Well, followed along and watched everyone else kill everything is more of an accurate description since I really didn't do anything at all.

The portal to the Foothills made the trip faster but not by much since it seemed to take forever to get started. We made it to the well to the Pitch Cave in about an hour and then the tough part started. Those in the know talked about what they were going to do and, like all of the other Pitch Cave trips I've been on, some people went in to either plant Kudzu or kill stuff and fell and then others went in to chain the first people out. Near the end Michael asked those of us who wanted to get to the book to stand south of him so I did. Then something happened OOC and I had to look away from the computer for about a minute. Naturally it was that minute when Michael told everyone to run to the book so of course I missed the call and so I missed running to the book. Not that I had an extremely high chance of making it to the book since there was a Pitch Noid in the inner chamber of the library where Giayl's book is located. It was possible since Kaitlyn made it both to the book and back but only three people in total made it to study from the book out of everyone who wanted to. Those remaining tried to get home through the EP and the plan was Michael was going to open the portal on the EP. I was actually able to run quite a bit in the EP before falling but since Michael didn't yell I didn't know where he was so I had no idea where the portal was. In the end we all departed since the snell was really packed and a rescue was impossible especially since we had no idea where we were.

All of this put me in a bad mood but since I had a feeling it would turn out this way I wasn't really all that upset. I don't even know why I bothered going. I knew from what happened in the first 30 minutes that the whole outing would turn out bad yet I went anyway because I wanted to spend the time around Michael and Manx even though they wouldn't give me the time of day even if I asked politely. I wasn't really certain I was correct in my assumption and I'd hate to leave only to learn later that the trip was a success.

I wish I could have made it to the book so I will never have to make this horrible trip ever again. I think Kiriel goes here fairly often. Maybe if I ask her she'll let me come along just to get to the book and then I will depart to not be a burden on them because I really can't hit anything down there. I hate being dead weight and down there I can be nothing but a useless burden and unlike what a certain Dwarf says, having faith in oneself and thinking happy positive thoughts can't make up for one's deficits in fighting skills, tactical knowledge, or overall abilities.

P.S. I'm going to have a much better post later today. I just wanted to write this to get it off my mind so I can focus on other things today. I'm feeling a lot less pissed off after writing this. (^_^)